Life is too short to waste time on a relationship that has no substance. If he's in a committed marriage or relationship, you are only allowing yourself to be used. Trust me, I was ';the other woman'; for 12 years. Thank God I finally saw the light. The lying and hurting doesn't stop. If anything it'll get worse before it's over. Do yourself a favor and save it for someone who'll appreciate it by being monogomous!!! You deserve more and should be stronger than to let anyone take advantage of you in such a personal way!!Help... I am in love with a married man?
u need to leave that married man along
let him go, many guys out there better then him and are single
There comes the old saying ';don't s**t where you eat'; my advice to you is to try and get another job...if you can't get another job just cut off all interactions with this man...if you need to talk to him at work keep the conversation work related and do not go beyond that...if he tries to change the subject ignore it and end the conversation
You have control. You are not a mindless robot and he does not have your remote control. Put yourself in his wife's shoes. Think of what she is going through, no matter how bad he paints a picture of her. Set your boundaries at work. He does not have an all access pass to you either.
just let things go
You have to help yourself here. Even if it means changing jobs. You already know what is going on is wrong. Wrong for you, wrong for him, wrong for your kids and wrong for his wife.
It will be hard and somewhat painful, but you have no future with him and even if you did, is this the kind of man you would want to be married to? What does this say about who he is? What kind of example are you setting for your kids? Make the break and find a man who deserves you, this one doesn't.
don't be foolish... if he will do this to his wife, he will do it to you someday. He is selfish and uncaring. Do you really want this for yourself? What if you were the wife?
Move on, remove his emotional hold by opening your eyes to the situation and be honest. You should want better for yourself and your children.
You can still work together... just be strong and determined to move ahead.
You've got a very heavy problem here. He's USING you and there's no future with him. He has hurt and lied to you, so your trust is dodgy, at best. You have the right idea...end things, and end it NOW before you really do get hurt.
You said you have two kids. Are you married? If you are, you could be putting your own marriage at risk if your husband discovers this affair. YES you're having an AFFAIR with a married man even if you're single.
Nobody wins in situations such as this, and your children will suffer too. Move on..and try to be happy WITHOUT the joker who's ruining your life.
i think u should move on because if he is doing that what u should move.
just dont talk to him, appologize to his wife, you have two kids? from who? find a real man.
Stop being so arrogant.
He is using you.. He knows that he can have you when he wants you.. When you get away from him something must happen that makes you want to go back to him.. You need to pull yourself out of the entire situation. Just imagine how his wife feels and if that was you.. I know you want to be happy but if he does not want to commit to you 100% then MOVE ON!!! besides if he did leave his wife for you there is a big chance you could be in the same shoes as his wife.. They do it once they will do it again..
This is an ugly situation, for sure. So I'll skip the crap and get to it.
1. It may not be easy, but you need to ignore him. Don't talk to him, and demand that things end if he persists.
2. Find something lengthy or difficult to get involved in. (try to avoid any addictions, they just make it worse) If you let something like, say, excercising, learning to use a new computer program, a videogame, etc.
3. Be strong! Even after you find something that works, your problems won't end immediately. But every day you do, it becomes easier.
I hope what i said helps you out. Good luck!
(^^)v
AN
First, your question says that you are in love with your kid. I know you didn't mean that and wanted to correct it for you.
Next, think ahead and back. First, if someone had told you a year ago that you would still be in the same situation, stealing a married man, letting him lie to you, to his wife, all this time, would you smack yourself?
Next look ahead. What if you are still in this same place in another year? Two? Five?
Lastly, karma is real. Not in that whimsical fairy way, but you are asking to be hurt in life. You knowing do a married man, but want life to treat YOU better? You knowing put yourself with a man that TELLS YOU HE LIES (I bet you can think of other times he has lied to you...to his wife...to work) and yet you expect some kind of honesty???? Are you mad?
You need to find someone else, and fast. I can see and understand that you are weak. That you can't pull yourself away. But rather than telling him you are dating around (The only reason you would tell him is to make him jealous, but he cheats and you have allowed him to use you for years......he is going to try to talk you out of it. So don't tell him you are dating.) Then when you find a real man, a man you can trust and have for YOURSELF, break it off with the married man.
You may need counseling. It's going to be hard for you to trust a good man, having made yourself believe a liar is more worth your time all this time. Good luck.
Adultery is never an option and cheating is wrong. Especially when there are children involved. If you can not bring yourself to let him go for your own reasons (( and I'll point out here that you have already named several so you already know he is bad for you )) Then do it for the kids. When adults can't control themselves you set a bad example for your children and make their lives difficult and unstable. The fact that this man is married only makes it worse because then your not just destroying one family you are destroying two. My best suggestion is to try and avoid him at work, ask him not to talk to you and when he presses the issue just refuse, snub him, walk off, go to the ladies room, tell someone at work (( like a supervisor)) that he is harassing you and that will free you from him talking to you there. - Next step, move on, put yourself out in public where you can meet new people. Find out about local groups who are involved in the hobbies you are interested in and involve yourself in them, - There will likely be SINGLE men you can meet. Maybe (( depending on the age of your kids)) Even look into play groups for the kids, there are lots of single fathers out there who are great people that will have at least one thing in common with you already and the socialization would also be good for the kids getting to know kids that are also from single parrent households. - The biggest thing is don't involve yourself with a married man, it's not worth it and it will only hurt you and the ones you love.
I have been on the wife's side, and it is not a pretty thing. Although, i think you both deserve better, have you ever thought about your child that you have with this man? Telling this child that his/her mother was only a side thing for his/her father is pretty embarrassing. I mean don't you want more for yourself and your children. You are only teaching them wrong and that being unfaithful in marriage is something that is okay. Believe in yourself and take action in your life. Leave him and make him responsible for his child. There are plenty good men out there and alot of them are not married.
the married man is a dead end street... statically he won't leave his wife for you and even if he did. he cheated on wife number 1 didn't he...wife number 2 would get the same treatment. you need to change jobs, even move if that's what it takes to get him out of your system. being with a married man is a lonely road. did you spend Christmas with him, doubtful... you deserve better, your children do...
You really don`t love him, if you did..you wouldn`t be sticking around and letting him USE you. We all are vulnable to our feelings, it supercede our minds. In any relationship the female gender is the strongest of both..ones who can survive a broken relationship. You need to show him it`s over, MOVE ON with your life. Two and a half years?? Work together? lol... now that is awesome, turn your life around, start dating and do start ignoring him. You know there`s no future with him. Stop being so weak with him, geeeeze!!! These relationships is so old, start thinking gurl!! You could burn this candle on both ends and have the best of both worlds...It`s all up to YOU!!
Ok, so first, change jobs if at all possible. This will obviously help since you won't have to see him every day. In general though, get out of that situation. I was with a married woman for some time, and it was hell. You know that you are sharing the person that you want with someone else, and the whole situation is just putting yourself through emotional punishment. If he hasn't left his wife in 2 1/2 years, he's not going to. And even if he did, think about it. What are the chances that this was a one time thing? You probably were not his first affair if he is capable of carrying it on for so long, and you wouldn't be the last I'm sure.
Trust me, I know the feeling of that dependency. When you guys are together, it probably feels like the most exciting thing in the world, but the fact is that he's married, and he does not value you. If he did, he wouldn't have started a relationship with you in the first place while married. Don't believe him when he says he will leave her. If he was so unhappy with her, he would have left her regardless of you coming along.
If I understand it right, he is the father of one of your kids? This, I'm sure, greatly complicates things, but I think you should sever those ties with him personally, and keep it to a relationship that involves the child. There is a saying that I like, it goes something like ';if you always do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten';. So, it sounds like it's time for some change, but it's up to you whether you want to keep putting yourself, and now your child, through this mess.
My advice, know that you're stronger than you've been acting, and get out.
Just plain RESPECT yourself %26amp; get a man who respects you!!!
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